Mother in law vs. Mother in law-Confrontation of co-partners
‘Your mother insulted
my family. It is unbearable for me,’
‘No, actually your mother needs to learn to behave with others.
She is an arrogant one,’
‘I know it’s your mother, who is yelling behind you as she
daily feed you on phone,’
‘I damn care…You know, in fact it’s your mother’s tongue in
your mouth,’
‘My mother got unwell just because of you,’
‘In fact, she excuses to fell ill to grab out your attention
and as well as your wallet…,’
‘Your parents don’t know, how to respect son in laws. People show gratitude and load gifts to their son in laws' famiky to earn their respect as you can
observe at my family,’
‘Yes, I observed a lot…the gifts…which your sisters tow and hide at your house... one week before. Above all they don't forget to advise you to check my bag twice before leaving to my mother,’
‘Shut up…you jealous prêt…I’m just tolerating you just because
of kids,’
‘Just the same I’m doing.’
The quarrel blew up and continued almost daily without any
ending between husband and wife. Both of them were complaining the same issue from opposite end. Both think that his/her spouse mother interfere a lot in their personal life and marriage affairs.
Everything was going fine and well in their life until the
escalation among both co- mothers in laws (mother of husband and mother of
wife) didn’t cross the borders. The situation was under control with mere
direct or indirect taunting comments until both co-mothers in laws met an open
confrontation in a recent family event.
Both co-mothers in laws had dominating personalities at their
houses, were enjoying reasonable financial status and had command and freedom to
tackle their actions so neither felt suppressed nor tensed while erupting up to
awkward personality judgments, disrespectful comments, discomfited charges and
narration of stories to degrade the family of opponent. A bulk of
complaints for not fulfilling the family customs and traditions from opponent
side and not providing enough comfort to their brood and family was also on
their agenda on fight.
The wife’s mother got aggressive at her affront and simply
left the event as offend petitioner. Husband’s mother found it
more appealing to make it at hospital to enforce her abuse from opponent party.
Whatever was the reason but after that incident both husband and wife couldn’t get
it normal and became more judgmental than to scrutinize the state of affairs
wisely. Their brawls which should be plotted on kid’s study, on buying of new
car or maintenance of house were stuck to my mother and your mother. This frustration spoiled their beautiful moments too.
These husband and wife were fortunate to have chance to drag
their relationship until the time came when they both realized the importance
of respecting and believing each other first, beyond of their immediate family
rivalry to encompass pleasant marital life. With time they learnt to manage and
deal both mothers. It was somewhere
their own unprompted description of their spouse and his/her family that their
mothers picked out points to came in front.
They figured it out that both mother in laws may satisfied their egos after that brawl and continued with their normal life at their homes, but somehow it put breaches on marital relationship of their children. The guidance of mothers may always beneficial but sometimes for reasons mother’s self-interests overlook the children's glee, so make it clear in your mind.
They figured it out that both mother in laws may satisfied their egos after that brawl and continued with their normal life at their homes, but somehow it put breaches on marital relationship of their children. The guidance of mothers may always beneficial but sometimes for reasons mother’s self-interests overlook the children's glee, so make it clear in your mind.
your mother…
your mother…
 |
| why my spouse mother in law interfere so much in my life? |
Mothers are precious, respectable and most beloved personality
of anyone’s life irrespective of any gender. Daughters or sons both have deep sentiments
attached to affection, care and sacrifices of their mothers which they showered
on them throughout their lives.
When two families truss in a new affiliation then to have grievance
or grudges from both sides is quite normal but for the couples, they should not
be extreme judgmental at any stage that it would ultimately affect their
relationship. Show your concerns for your mother but pay due respect to your
spouse mother too as she has the same place in your spouse life as you reserve
for your own mother. It require some time to indulge and believe in new bonding and deal the previous one.
It’s a real challenge for both spouses to continue cheerful marriage with such overwhelming and oversecure mothers, so when you meet such challenge then deal it wisely, stay firm at your point by maintaining at least most possible verbal distance and not let anyone else to disturb your marital life. Forgo few of your spouse comments for the sake your relationship. Any possible culpability or interference from any side will be evident or will be less effective with time. Time unveil and settle many issues so watch your steps carefully before reaching any decision or to develop any strong negative perception that you don't have to be embarrassed in future.
Let your immediate families and mother in
laws to settle down with their issues and to prolong a blessed life with your
spouse and kids.